Why is it so hard to not be materialistic and superficial? I mean intrinsically we know that being materialistic and superficial is a bad thing, but when everyone else is not only doing it, when others measure people by the amount of materialistic things they have, it becomes such a challenge to avoid this jumping on board this band wagon.
So how to be less superficial and materialistic?
So I’ve animated the second chapter from my best selling 90 Second Life Coach book here, let’s enjoy the video first.
So here is chapter 2 of ‘The 90 Second Life Coach‘ book in its entirety for you. The book is a fully structured life coaching book, where each chapter is designed to read in 90 seconds, here’s a sample for you.
Chapter 2: Why having more stuff won’t make you happier
From the moment you were born, every single media and advertising outlet has been bombarding you with the message that we need more stuff to be happy. Whether it’s a new phone (which is identical in almost every way to your current phone), a wristband that tells you your heart rate and temperature (because only a loser would actually wear a plain watch), the latest designer suit (with the label on the inside where no-one will ever see it anyway) or even worse, a designer bag (because you need to advertise their product for them), we have been programmed since birth that having ‘things’ will make us happier and somehow make us into better people!
So does having all this stuff actually make us any happier?
It probably made you feel good for a while to have that pair of designer sunglasses – it certainly felt great posting pictures on social media with your new wares – but how long did that feeling last? How often did you keep checking your status to see who’d ‘liked’ it? Did you get enough ‘likes’? How long before you started wondering about all those who didn’t ‘like’ or ‘comment’? Did you focus more on those people than on those who took a single second to hit the ‘like’ button?
I learnt this lesson many years ago. Obviously looking and feeling particularly miserable one day, my friend asked me what was wrong. I said to him, ‘It’s because I don’t have a girlfriend.’ His reply was so profound that it changed my outlook immediately. He said, ‘So what, you think having someone else will make you happy?’
What I took away from that (and I appreciate that he may have meant something else) was that nobody or nothing else can make you happy, until you are happy inside.
Happiness is already within you, it just needs unlocking Happiness may not be those shiny ‘things’ that the media says you need to be happy, but by allowing yourself to be happy with who you are, you will grow and achieve what you want in life. And it won’t be superficial, material things. It will be things like fulfilment, a sense of being, and the knowledge that you are accomplishing your goals. That’s something a TV ad can’t sell.
This change, coupled with the law of attraction, will bring more happiness into your life.
For me, deciding that I would just be happy allowed a remarkable thing to happen almost immediately. By attracting into my life things that made me happy, I started doing all the things that I wanted to do and started to get more and more out of all the things that made me happy.
It didn’t have to do with anything material – I didn’t even have a car at the time or much money – but it was the things that I was ‘doing’ that made me happy, not the ‘having’.
In fact, when I was doing my Master’s at university, I remember living in a very modest house surrounded by great flatmates and loads of friends, having fun every day. I felt truly happy because I was doing exactly what I wanted to do with so many great people, having so much fun – yet I had no car, no fancy apartment and no flash watch (in fact no watch at all).
You see, the feeling leads to the action, and the action then leads to the result. Start with feeling happy with what you have. That way, you’ll then start to do the things you want to do, and when you’re grateful and happy, you won’t spend your time whinging and bitching about how awful your life is. Instead, you’ll see and appreciate all the great things about your life. As you might expect, the type of actions you’ll take when you’re in that space will result in you achieving the things that you want. You may not hit those results you want immediately, but think of this as a flow:
You’ll certainly get closer to the results you want and feel better about life too.
Happiness does not come from a place of ‘having’; it comes from a place of ‘being’. And the more you ‘be’ who you want to be, the happier and more fulfilled you will become.
Okay I hope this brought you huge value, please leave a comment below and tell me your thoughts, have you been a victim to materialism? Do you find yourself caught up in the competitive race against others to not only have more (i.e. materialism) but to let others know that you have more (i.e. superficiality). I’d be really intersted to hear your stories and help.
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Thanks so much